Gender Differences - Understanding the dual nature of reactivity & proactivity - Part 1

That being said, unless you have a large body of interests with your partner, you are most likely to fall into one of the two categories in the relationship. Though I could be wrong, since numerous closed studies would be needed between couples in order to elucidate the following facts. One of the individuals within the relationships will need to take on each of the roles ie. reactivity and proactivity. In many relationships where the men are the most masculine and the strongest of the genders, the role of proactivity may go to them whereas the females will have a more reactivity type role. Based on my experience, these type of roles can have serious underpinnings and grievances to the entire relationship if it’s not properly understood.

Take the case of a young couple where the female has understands her role to be fixed in any men vs women relationship. She would expect her partner to make most of the moves regarding where they go on a date and what he chooses to do or decide. It is very similar to the animal kingdom where the male is the predator when it comes to hunting females for mating. In this situation, the male over time may have certain expectations from the females and the female needs to be able to see this and play a more active role. However, it is entirely possible that a female who appears to be in a reactive role is ‘in fact’ playing a subtle ‘proactive’ role. For example, she induces a reactionary role within the partner just simply by observation and making subtle moves. This could also stem from the women’s survival skills to hold on to her partner so that she has someone who can father her children and will always be around for this.

It is a cautionary tale of love & conquests that we hear of from many romantic novels and movies. The roles of proactivity and reactivity are significant factors that come into play in a relationship without many men or women being aware of it. For some people who are skilled in the art of seduction, they may have a good handle on this technique and many men and women may unwittingly fall for this. Next time you find yourself being pulled in a certain direction, you may want to think for a moment whether you are in fact playing a proactive or a reactive role.

Gender Differences - Understanding the dual nature of reactivity & proactivity - Part 3

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I was fortunate enough to witness two good friends of mine who were both exceptionally extroverted locked in a conversation. There are very good reasons why people sometimes use the term ‘opposites attract’ and here was a perfect example of this. Both of my friends were passionate about making their voices heard and their conversation ended up just being that with absolutely no dialogue at one point in time. It was very funny and somewhat entertaining to watch. Mind you, I wasn’t laughing at them, I was simply observing the outcome of the conversation which seemed to lead nowhere.

It occurred to me that in much the same way that men vs men can get locked in a conversation, there must be subtle differences in the way we converse with say men vs women or women vs women. Men usually hear stories about how women find it so natural to talk to each other with ease and many would go onto to converse for hours without even thinking. With the men vs women conversation and in particular when they are in a relationship the art of communicating takes on a whole new meaning. I sense that in that type of relationship one could pursue a communication that is tailored to prolong or forge the relationship rather than upset it.

In a courtship relationship between men and women, both have an interest at the outset of how the relationship will unfold and this triggers in each how to best communicate. Naturally there are agendas and self-interested pursuits within each individual and this will directly have a bearing on the outcome of the relationship and therefore the communication aspects too. It maybe the reason why couples are initially very aloof when they first start dating and it’s only after time that they become comfortable with each other.

Gender Differences - Understanding the dual nature of reactivity & proactivity - Part 2

Tags: art of relationship, communicate, courtship relationship, dating, Gender Differences - Understanding the dual nature of reactivity & proactivity - Part 1, good friends, men vs women, opposites attract, women vs women

Use of the internet has increased the openness and readiness of dating within teenagers. Now an average teenager starts dating at the age of 14. However dating at different stages of life has different meanings to online singles.

When a teenager starts dating at the age of 14, this age is also called the adolescence period, both male and female teenager goes through a lot of physical and psychological changes. These changes attract both genders towards each other. At this age a majority of the young couples get attracted towards each other because of the physical changes that take place. The teenager has some sort of peer pressure or competition to date the hottest girl in school or dating the cool guys in school which also turns out to be the factor that attracts teenagers towards dating.

Once they goes through this phase and hits their 20th birthday, the physical attraction seems to be top for the young online singles where they search partners for one night stands or friends with benefits. This state of mind remains till age 25 but for some this can be found well into their late 20s. Singles from this age group would at least want to settle down in life rather than just pursuing for carnal pleasures.

Once singles hit their 30s they start thinking about true love, long term relationships and settling down in life. This is where the online singles in that age bracket look for serious dates as they now wish to settle down in life. However, there are many singles who still want to enjoy their single status and want to enjoy their independence and have more fun with their single status.

Comment on this post and let us know what you think about the emotions behind dating at different age groups.

Tags: adolescence, carnal pleasures, dating, hottest girl, long term relationships, Meaning of Dating at Different Age of Life for Online Singles, physical and psychological changes, single status, teenagers

A recent website designed for middle-age men or ‘sugar daddies’ made headline news in UK with the type of recruits it was attracting. Apparently college girls or undergraduates of many famous UK universities have signed up for this service. Their reasoning..the high cost of school fees and an uncertain future in this harsh economic times. Many who have signed up are looking for stable and established gents to pair up with and to provide them with a secure future.

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The whole story almost sounds like a fairy story but now in the modern times the prince does not come galloping in shining armor but more with the tinge of coins. Most young men that are graduating today will have to pay off their big school fees and then on top of that establish their castle before seeking out their fair maidens. Unfortunately, these fair maidens cannot wait that long and a majority of their problems are solved if they go directly to the kings of the castle.

Related Dating Article - Irvine dating – Rules To Be Followed While Dating Older Women

Times have changed and we are much more likely to see a new shift in the way men and women date. Wealthy nations inevitably have a high cost of living and place much demands on its citizen in terms of the earning power required for survival. The skilled workforce are being shifted to other parts of the globe where a labor force is readily available and only highly skilled jobs are the ones with a better prospect and future. Even then, it will take a professional to acquire sufficient wealth before he/she can enjoy a conducive family life without the headaches of financial worries.

Related dating article - Essential gender criterias in the dating game - part 1

It is not surprising then, that many young women are already gazing into the future with a view to a stable future in light of the modern times. Apart from the financial stability enjoyed in this type of relationship, younger women can also expect a more mature person with the package. Coupled with the fact that children would be the primary focus of their relationship, she can be assured that their offsprings will also have a good education and an upbringing in society. This thinking in many ways is almost synonymous with the biological and evolutionary makeup of women since the dawn of time.

Source - Students join controversial sugar daddy dating site in their droves - as founder says soaring British university fees are to blame

Tags: college girls, College girls are now looking for dates with financially established men, date, financial stability, relationship, stable and established gents, young women

The mind is such a powerful force that we have yet to grasp a full understanding of its intricacies and operation. We could equate this with the famous Heisenberg theory of the uncertainty principle which generally states that the closer we get to the atomic scale the more difficult it becomes to detect the particle. In essence, the same applies to the mind where no microscopic surgical procedure of the brain can explain some of the wider implications of the mind.

The mind is clearly a vast source of limitless energy where it shapes the personality and being of every individual. Many psychologists have debated the subject of the mind and have come up with words such as the ego, conscious and the subconscious to explain the behavior of men and women. There have been great thinkers of the past such as the Greek philosopher Socrates who questioned the logic of many people’s normal way of thinking in order to shed new light into the moral conduct of men. We can take some lessons from these past heroes and we too can shape our mind and thinking for the better.

One of the first principles that we can take away from the philosophers of our past is to see clearly through the maze of consciousness that sometimes weigh us down. Eckhart Tolle’s book on the ‘Power of Now’ shows that it is at the moment of time that we are at our greatest. To me, that singularly defines the condition of the mind since it is at this point where there is no past or future and everything rests on the ‘Now’. In short, you have the ability to change the course of the future by your mental condition at the moment in time. This is why I feel that many people who wield so much power or influence over us have the uncanny ability to control that very situation in that short instance in time.

We can apply this very kind of thinking when we meet other people, talk to strangers, meet up for a date and so forth. Revelling in the moment you are in opens you to higher creative possibilities and tunes you to a higher frame of thought that will have give you eventual benefits. Next time you are with someone or on a date, think for a second and enjoy the singular moments in time and you will see more ideas flood into your head than ever before. Conversation or any undertaking that you have planned will almost become like a breeze.

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