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Online Dating Briefs by Dr. Dato - He’s so fine online, but what’s he really like?


Monday, February 7th, 2011

man and woman - getting to know each other

man and woman - getting to know each other

Article Subject: He’s so fine online, but what’s he really like?

Article Link: http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2011/02/06/AR2011020603427.html

Website: none

Dr. Dato’s Brief:

This is an interesting article that talks about online dating encounter can be similar or dissimilar to dating encounters in the real world. Typically strangers who are not known through you or family or colleagues fall into the category of the ‘unknown’ and therefore you should tread carefully.

However, treading carefully may give the impression that the person cannot be trusted as pointed out by one reader who also claims that there are no differences between meeting someone online or say in a bar. Women generally don’t want to reveal their true identity in case of ‘issues’ further ahead.

The important point to this post, is that both men and women need to remain vigilant about each other until a mutual trust can be developed between the dating partners. Who is to tell if the woman is clingy or abusive or the man is just simply playing the game?



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Online Dating Briefs by Dr. Dato - The Unwritten Rules of Online Dating


Sunday, February 6th, 2011

Article Subject: The Unwritten Rules of Online Dating

Article Link: http://www.prematureejaculationspray.org/the-unwritten-rules-of-online-dating-3

Website: none

Dr. Dato’s Brief:

Here we have a good article the provides genuine common sense advise on the unwritten rules of online dating.

The article describes how ‘going slow’ particularly for men is important at the initial stage of contact and so you don’t come across as desperate. One has to manage a respectable pace in responding to emails allowing yourself to understand the profiles writing to you and giving you ample time to submit a good reply. All very good advise.

The emphasis on building repertoire and trust with the other individual applies equally well in online dating.

The first encounter should be in a public place and ideally a coffee house where the conversation can be kept short if there is no mutual interest.

The final point about being persistent and having patience is key to achieving success in the online dating scene.

patience & persistence leads to online dating success

patience & persistence leads to online dating success



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Online Dating Briefs by Dr. Dato - Online Dating Sites for Beginners


Saturday, February 5th, 2011

Article Subject: Online Dating Sites for Beginners

Article Link: http://www.adi-news.com/online-dating-sites-for-beginners/28090/

Website: none

Dr. Dato’s Brief:

Again, a very stark article on this subject, it makes me wander why sites put up these articles in the first place.

The article (maybe 150 words) makes no reference to any of the dating sites except talks about the generic dating types available which most common folks will know about anyways. These include religious, ethnic sites etc.

Here is my short article on ‘Online Dating Sites for Beginners’ and where you will get some ‘value’ than the article posted above.

I would suggest that you first join many of the free larger dating sites which include Plentyoffish.com, Datehookup, OkCupid and Jumpdates. These sites have a larger member base than most of the other sites and you are likely to have more success with these sites than say going to a unknown sites which claim many members. Watch out for those and in particular read some of the reviews of the free dating sites here.

Make sure to have all the information handy, so it becomes easy for you to join these sites in one sitting. The information you are likely to fill include your email address, personality, height, weight, what you like/dislike, what your tastes are and what kind of a partner you are looking for. Almost all of the websites require you to add a photo and a good article on this can be found here.

In addition to trying out these free dating sites, I would also recommend that you join some of the other subscription based sites which include match, eharmony, chemistry etc. These sites will normally require you to pay a monthly charge which can range anywhere from $10-$40.

Do not think that subscription based dating sites must be better than the free dating sites I mentioned just because its paid, in actual fact that may not be the case. Let me explain with respect to an analogy. For example, say that you went to see a movie and you come out thinking how wonderful the movie was. You do not ask yourself ‘how much it took for the producers to make this movie? The straight fact is that you enjoyed the movie. In the same token when you join a dating website, be it paid or completely free, you don’t care about this issue, you are interested in how it has worked for you. Both categories of sites may appeal to you, for some people, they may find the free site working for them better than the paid site.

So here we have it in a nutshell, for all the newbies who have jumped into the bandwagon of online dating. For further information or help, please drop me a line.

free online dating sites can be just as good as paid sites

free online dating sites can be just as good as paid sites



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Online Dating Briefs by Dr. Dato - Facebook photos ‘land on’ dating site


Saturday, February 5th, 2011

Article Subject: Facebook photos ‘land on’ dating site

Article Link: http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/tech/social-media/Facebook-photos-swiped-for-dating-website/articleshow/7431537.cms#toreply2769096

Website: lovely-faces.com, facebook

Dr. Dato’s Brief:

Most people don’t understand the technical aspects of how other sites can manage to to easily extract information from one site and build a new on like in this case.

I will attempt to give you a quick tutorial on the relative ‘ease’ at which information can be extracted from other sites by anyone. This will hopefully provide some insights as to how the internet works, if you didn’t know already.

The biggest ’scraper’ of websites in the world is Google, it needs to do that in order to provide useful information to all the users through its search engine page. Basically Google sends out what is called a Google bot to any site it wants to find out more about. The bot essentially drills through the home page and subsequent pages following link by link and using its unique algorithm it can determine what the website is all about. It then stores this information into its own database which is queried by all the users around the world.

In this way Google is able to deliver meaningful and useful information to its end user. As it so happens the site can be small or large that the bot is looking at and so the bot needs to do a lot of crawling and keep returning to the site to properly index all of its web pages into its own database. Since the website can have changing content, this will trigger the bot to come back regularly to the website to pick up on new content.

Here is the caveat; some websites have a ‘login’ feature which allows user to enter the website and see private information regarding the account. Google has no knowledge of the accounts held in the site and is therefore unable to login and see the pages ‘behind’ the accounts. In similar fashion, some of your web pages in your facebook account are public and the others are private depending on your privacy settings in facebook. The only pages that another ‘hacker’ can lift are the pages that are public.

So in short, it is really pointless to blame the finger on privacy concerns when our information is already public to the world. This is why Facebook is unable to take a rigid stance on this, because it might as well slap Google on the hands for doing the same. But we all know that is not going to happen.

facebook - how much do you know about its privacy settings?

facebook - how much do you know about its privacy settings?



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Online Dating Briefs by Dr. Dato - Love the one who loves what you love


Saturday, February 5th, 2011

Article Subject: Love the one who loves what you love

Article Link: http://www.theglobeandmail.com/life/family-and-relationships/love-the-one-who-loves-what-you-love/article1893458/

Website: Cupidtino.com, Tastebuds.fm

Dr. Dato’s Brief:

Here is an interesting article which tries to grapple with the ongoing mystery of whether like attracts like and if two misfits are better suited to each in terms of personality.

Two new websites have sprung up to bring people together with similar tastes, the first Cupidtino.com which is a take on the Apple website but not affiliated with them tries to bring together fans of Apple products into the dating scene. As expected a majority of the member base are Apple employees. The idea originated when the founder said that his girlfriend was pestering him for paying more attention to his gadgets over her.

The second site Tastebuds.fm is for music lovers and the concept behind this site is to bring relationships together with common musical interests.

Although, I would agree that having similar tastes in music or electronic gadgets can reinforce the relationships, I do not feel that we should put such paramount importance to them. I believe the sites developed so far are just another angle in the marketing campaigns to entice new members to join. If you were to examine the conversations taking place between the members of the site, I would imagine that couples would pretty quickly exhaust all possibilities of the topics of conversation in gadgets and music!
Now lets see “What was your name again?

cupidtino dating site catering to gadget fans

cupidtino dating site catering to gadget fans



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