Squabbles between couples are a good thing - image courtesy classic105.com

It is a well known fact that some of the gender differences are known to scientists and psychologists alike. One of these differences lies in how a man or a woman use their cognitive abilities that they are inherently born with and apply it to their daily lives. Women are considered more instinctual thinkers and think of details whereas men are more pragmatic in the way they reach their conclusions. So who is right and who is wrong. It would be a complete waste of time and energy to deduce one gender is greater in some respects than man. However, we cannot argue the fact that this is definitely a man’s world. ‘It would be nothing without a woman or a girl’, the lyrics of the famous artist and singer James Brown, ‘It’s a Man’s, Man’s Man’s World’.

To argue over the instinctual nature of women and the logical sense of men would be futile in exercise and like comparing apples and oranges. The right approach to these differences is to understand how these differences can work together to bring about something greater than by itself. The gnawing and thrashing of couple squabbles is in actual fact a good thing. This usually arrives from polarized views in their thinking ie. the instinctual versus the logic. What many people don’t realize that each time you arrive at an agreement from those squabbles there is a greater awareness and understanding of cooperation between couples. This should be a goal and known fact from the social interaction of couples. However, there is a BIG catch for this to work smoohtly and effectively. If one feels defeated and bitter over an argument, the couple’s relationship may take a path for the worse. What can possibly be good from one party having been defeated over their arguments by a decisive win by the other party. All couples should take note. It is a marriage of co-operation and both have to give and take without harboring ill feelings between each other.

Unfortunately, in the ideal world we are not made to act or react in such a way depending of course on the topic of arguments or discussion. Our opinions and arguments stem from the way we have been brought up and the way we shape our personalities from our internalized experiences. But the truth remains that we have some qualities and values that we can always aim for in order to make ourselves better than what we are. These traits have been passed through generation after generation and they can come in any shape or form ie. cultural, religious, spiritual, hardship etc. But there are common threads of human qualities that we put head and shoulders above the rest. These include sincerity, generosity, kindness, integrity amongst others. If we are true to those values than I will make a bold a statement that the world would be cured of 99% of the problems we see facing today.

So the lesson learned is that the next time you come out of an argument, make sure you have the empathy in check so that both individuals have gained something positive out of the argument.